Curves, Cereal, and Motivation

I love cereal. I mean, l-o-v-e it. There are usually no less than five or six varieties on top of my fridge at any given time. It's healthy cereal, for the most part. Right now, there's:

Cinnamon Cheerios
Multigrain Cheerios
Kashi Go-Lean Crunch
Shredded Mini-Wheats
Fiber One Raisin Bran Clusters

Granted, all of that cereal does not belong to me. The Kashi and Cheerios are mine; the mini-wheats and fiber one are my husbands.

Even though I love cereal, it does not love me. Cereal is one of my comfort foods, in a major way. However, since I am diabetic, I can only eat it rarely, as it usually wreaks havoc on my blood sugar levels. I almost never eat it for breakfast, as that is when my sugar is the highest. Often, I'll eat it for a snack in the evening.

I used to eat cereal every morning. "A bowl" of cereal. Oh, that's not too bad, you might be thinking. Except this is my "bowl" of cereal:
1. Dump a large amount of cereal into a huge bowl.
2. Add a lot of milk.
3. Eat it. There is milk left in the bowl.
4. Add more cereal, to soak up the extra milk.
5. Ooops, I added too much cereal. Add more milk.
6. Eat it all.

That's a bowl of cereal. At least, it used to be. Now, I eat my cereal for a evening snack, and I measure it out. Into a mug. That way, it looks like more than what it is. I don't have seconds. It stinks. But it's better than nothing.

Anyway, I have given up cereal for breakfast. Now I eat one or more of the following in the morning:

2 eggs
greek yogurt
fruit
peanut butter

My breakfast of choice lately has been two scrambled eggs, a banana, and some peanut butter. It keeps me full for a long time, whereas a bowl of cereal would find me hungry again in an hour or so.

Also, I joined Curves gym again. The one I belong to now has a class with Zumba two nights a week. It is a lot of fun, but I'm struggling with the motivation to go. I have gone three times in the last two weeks (you are supposed to go three times each week!). But you can't bring babies, so I have to go in the evening when DH is home from work, and then there's dinner and so much to do, it ends up getting pushed to the back-burner.

Why is it always to hard to take care of ourselves?

As moms and wives, we know how important it is to take care of the people in our lives, and really, we know we need to take care of ourselves. But when it comes time to actually do it, there's always an excuse for why now is not the right time.

Now is the only time there is. Being healthy is an everyday battle. I keep forgetting this, even though I know better.

Then I feel guilty, and eat more chocolate, and then the whole day goes to hell. This is bad. My emotional eating, as a way of dealing with the stress of new motherhood, is keeping me in this place of hating how I look and feel. More on this later. But know for now that I need motivation to keep my butt at the gym, and my hand out of the chip bag.